Thursday, October 29, 2009

Cracker Barrel

Although the style of food and my southern location say we should be a match made in heaven, (ok and the name too, being that I'm white and all), I really don't like the Cracker Barrel. In their defense though, I believe it is just our local establishment that I dislike. I ate at one in Tennessee and it was really good, although it was about 10yrs ago so that could have something to do with it.

I do like the gift shop. I wish they would drop their prices. I can get most of the items somewhere else for a fraction of the cost, but as much as I would love to just shop elsewhere and write off Cracker Barrel forever, I am currently stalking an item in their Halloween section until it goes on sale. It's a giant bobble head witch in a Nightmare Before Christmas style. The thing is the size of an actual toddler. Really cute and if you happen to know when it would go on sale, give me a heads up.

I also have a slight webkinz obsession and find myself in the gift shop regularly for those, and of course I have to buy a few sticks of their multi flavored candy canes, (butter rum and cotton candy!) which make you feel like a kid all over again with every lick.

I know what you're thinking. "Boy, she sure spends a lot of time in that place if she hates it so much" and to that I say, "It sucks you in, and that is all the more reason to dislike it!" Really though, aside from high prices, I don't have anything against the gift shop. It's once you walk in past that podium and the Tammy Faye wanna-be hostess that I start to have issues.

What I really hate, other than the food, is their ugly and dangerous decor. Once I sat below a display of rusty round saw blades from and old table saw. I was too nervous to see if they were hanging by the one tiny nail I suspected they were. Another time, I look up to see a giant plow part suspended in mid air with blades of death aimed at each of my children, but they were all holding pegs of that triangular table game up to their heads pretending to be Shrek for about an hour while we waited on our colorless food to get there, and the plow wasn't really scaring me much any more.

I also hate the staff, and that is saying a lot because I like people and especially like interacting with odd people (I don't get out much) but the Cracker Barrel waitstaff are eerily weird. I know I live in a "red neck" area and finding a "hick" isn't that difficult really, but they found the best of them and I use that term loosely. I already mentioned Tammy Faye the hostess with the mostest (make up), and then you have the waiter, that is obviously gay, yet acts like an ancient gray haired greasy spoon waitress by calling you "honey" or "darlin" and all I can guess is that this is the closest thing to "theatre" he will ever get to do in this town. It's creepy! He stays in character though, except once when my oldest asked for an item without onion and he says with a limp wrist, "That's a good girl, cause onions are plain NASTY!" oops, you let your gay show! It was the first time I liked being on the dark side of the podium, but it was short lived.

I had Tammy Faye stand in as the waitress once and that was even worse. She actually suggested I eat the grilled chicken strips until she forced me to pick them, and when they arrived, she stood over me saying "Taste it! I'll wait until you do. They are good!" and she did indeed wait as I let her peer pressure me at 30 years of age to eat the darn chicken right in front of her. All I could think was, wow, if this was poisoned (which I suspected for a few minutes) it would have been a really odd way to go. I'm pretty sure she even gave me a little clap. Totally weird. A moment Ms. Thang still laughs about on occasion.

I've only ever eaten there using gift cards. Nothing can be worse than eating at the Cracker Barrel. OH WAIT, watching Where the Wild Things Are, was worse, by a bored to death hair.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Vasectomy and You

My honey is getting "the snip" in January and the doctors were kind enough to send us an informative pamphlet in the mail. Although it's dated 2004, the clip art is clearly from the 50s. Example: The caption reads, "To avoid complications, be sure to take it easy for the first few days after surgery." Below, is a picture of a man in his recliner being served fruit slices, a bottle of pills, and a glass of ice water by his smiling wife.

I also enjoyed this little gem of information:
"After a vasectomy, your male hormone levels remain the same. This means your sex drive, hair distribution, and the pitch of your voice won't change."

Strangely, my Honey isn't finding this nearly as funny as I am.

So it IS true

You know how you always hear about those moms that are up late finishing those 2 dozen cupcakes or sewing a last minute costume that they JUST found out about a few hours before? Well that really happens lol. At least the costume part and well, to be honest, I wasn't sewing it, and the last minute part was my fault, but still. I felt like some sort of cliche as I stayed up finishing last night, and at the same time, I felt like I was part of an elite group that has been doing this since the beginning of time (well.. at least since the beginning of Kindergarten). We are not just women, we are MOM! Here us roar..ok yeah, sorry I was up late.

Anyway, the situation: The Scientist was to dress up as a story book character. Easy enough right? Then I read the line under it and things got difficult.

"There can be NO accessories such as swords, eye patches, wands etc. as we will be moving from room to room and these items tend to get lost or mixed up. PLEASE NO ACCESSORIES."

Now tell me a story book character with out accessories! I considered a character in the book Morning Dance, with a bear that is in his pajamas for some of the story, but there was just something weird about sending him to school in pajamas. His are practically long underoos, and not that warm. Anyway, long story short we decided to make him THING 2 from Dr. Seuss's Cat in the Hat. I sent in the form telling the teacher what he would be, along with a copy of the book per request.

What I forgot was that he would be dressing up that following Friday, and Thursday night, as I got ready for bed, I lay my glasses on my night stand and set them right on top of the iron-on letters I had placed there so I would not forget.


But I finished it on time and here he is this morning looking a little sleepy:

Red sweat shirt- Thrift shop- $.75
White fabric- Back of a stained up South Padre vacation shirt
White fabric paint (trim around white)- $2 @ Hobby Lobby
Iron on letters-$3 @ Hobby Lobby
No sew tape- Already had a roll on hand

Not too shabby! Of course my cutie can pull of any look. I tried to get him to put a little blue color spray on his hair, but he was not having it. He is not really into dressing up at all (Which is strange considering his father apparently wore his Halloween costumes until they fell off). It's fun to tease the poor kid with threats of making him appear less than "normal". A little comment like, "Hey, want me to give you a mohawk?" during a hair cut can be hours of fun.

I'll end this with a quick Scientist funny since this is turning out to be a post all about him.

Scientist: (as he is dressing) Are you supposed to have HANDS all over your underwear?
Me: (eyebrow raised) No...why?
Scientist: Well these have HANDS all over them.
Me: Where?
Scientist: Right here. (pointing to the HANES elastic band)


Monday, October 19, 2009

Get it she does not

Ms Thang in reference to Halloween: "You should go as Dark Vader."

Honey being a smartass: "Who the heck is Dark Vader?"

Ms. Thang: "You know, the guy with the red life saver?"

Honey: "Does he eat it?"

Ms. Thang: "Oh my gosh! And y'all call me a blonde."

Random Fall Pictures

I had planned on taking the girls to the pumpkin patch, but we went to my in-laws house to pick up the boy, and ended up spending the day there in the garden. My son goes there every Saturday to spend time with his grandfather. He LOVES it. There is a playhouse my father-in-law built for all the kids a long time ago, but the older girls never really got into it. Now, the house has been turned into a Sprinkler Shop, full of pipes and sprinkler parts galore. Throw in a million different types of veggies and fruit trees, an 13yr old lab named Shelby, a rusty car my brother-in-law will never let go of, and you have a little boys piece of heaven on earth.

Here are some of the pics I took:

This was just before we left. That is actually the neighbors house. Note the line in the grass. Our house was the first one that looked seasoned for Fall. My honey scalped it late Sept. and turned off the sprinklers.

And then a quick trip to the grocery store. My cutiepatootie in a sea of carts.

The playhouse turned Sprinkler Shop. Initials above the door for each grandkid. It is tall enough for her to stand, she was just peeking out.

Cutecumber with Grandma (*note hairbows are gone)

Apples in the tree. They are DELICIOUS. I wasn't even washing them, just polishing the bird crap off and going for it lol

The kids on Claudia (Uncle G's car)

Few edited pics: (I may have to do a reshoot here with different clothes)

He keeps offering his uncle 100 pennies for her, but he just can't win!

Cutecumber and her grandpa. Mouth full of apple and her hair in its "let's go home" stage.

Maybe we can get around to that pumpkin patch this week. :)

Wednesday, October 14, 2009


I know I have my holidays all out of order, but such is my life ok!

I just saw these on and I really want to make them for the kids.

Watch how HERE

I also want to do these for the scientists lunch box.

See how HERE

I'd add more, but it's late and I'm supposed to be sleeping. I just wanted to get these saved before I forgot.

Christmas (skip if the word makes you cringe!)

That's right! I know about half of my *cough* 200 or so readers probably just rolled their eyes and I admit that I can see how prematurely mentioning Christmas could possibly be annoying, but as the weather cools, I start imagining logs in the fireplace. That leads to visions of my family in red and green pj's with cups of hot coco and before you know it, my scene is including a tree and gifts. I can't help it!

Now I'm not singing Christmas carols quite yet (katie) but I am browsing silently for gifts. Ms Thang is getting harder and more expensive. A $10 barbie doesn't cut it anymore, and having just had her birthday, what she needs is... well, NOTHING! I had a hard enough time trying to figure out what to get her then, or suggesting things to family, but now I need to buy multiple items and it's going to be tough. Off the top of my head: clothing, electronics, cds/dvds, money, but those seem so...impersonal. She will be the hardest to shop for this year. I'm thinking of getting her a tall stand up jewelry box. She has a ton of jewelry and I thought that seems sort of grown up. Something like THIS, what do you think?

Now the scientist doesn't really need anything either, but he is at the age where every toy commercial is targeted toward his age group and I'm sure to get a million ideas from him this year. I'm thinking train accessories for his track table. They are pricey, but he loves them and a few go a long way. Plus, I am already thinking that a big track set will have a great resale value later down the road, unlike 3 broken transformers and bent up hotwheel tracks.

The baby is a little difficult since she also just had a birthday and her needs are nil. I'm thinking I want to go the clothing route since babies go through sizes so quickly and she really won't care what she gets as long as Santa brings her something fun. I thought about a little potty, but I'm still wondering if I should just skip that whole thing this time. It would cramp the small bathroom, it is pretty gross really, and why not use the money to buy a stool to get up on the real potty that she can later use to wash her hands as well. Sorry.. getting side tracked.

Now my Honey is easy. Not that I really know what he wants now, but he LOVES to make a list lol. Luckily he is good at varying the price range from a LED lighted key chain to a $500 tool box.
We usually try and spend the bulk on something we needed and pretend it's exactly what we wanted, like a new vacuum for her, and a printer for him, or something along those lines, but we always get something else that we know the other truly wanted. I'm hoping to get a new recycling center like this, but I've hinted for 3 yrs in a row and nothing. Honey (silently and would never say) hates recycling. I am a bit of a nazi if I see someone throw a recyclable in the trash. Maybe if I promise to chill out....

A few other ideas floating in my head are:
*a new towel for each family member. Extra large with an embroidered name. I'll probably keep 1 or 2 extras for guests or whatever and get rid of the rest. We have 5 family members and 20+ towels. It's stupid and encourages them to toss it in the laundry after one use. That adds up an unnecessary load or two pretty quickly. Plus, I know exactly who to yell at when I find one on the floor. That should help teach responsibility too..yeah, I might as well put this on the actual list.

*I want to get the dog one of these. Stupidly expensive, but these ARE just ideas.

Well, cutecumber just woke up so you are released from my holiday talk for now, but prepare yourself for more. We've only just begun! <-- you thought that was going to lead you to a Christmas carol didn't you?

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Morning funny

Honey: "Looks like I need to buy a new candle lighter."

Scientist: " You could hurry up and go to the store and buy one that looked just like it and no one would ever know."

Honey: "No one cares if I buy a new one."

Scientist: "What about the Care bears? The Care bears care."


Ps..Zombieland was great!

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Periods and Zombies

Things in the "Q" house are going great. Finally everyone is feeling better. I actually feel better than I have in years. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that my hormones are finally in some time of normal state after having just finished breast feeding the baby. Before that, I was pregnant, and before that on birth control where I didn't even have periods and before that I was breast feeding the boy, and before that pregnant. It's been over 5 years since I have been "myself" and MAN IT FEELS GREAT! I still have a few weeks before my next "hormonal surge" so I'm trying to enjoy my new chemically balanced state of mind while it lasts.

How did I start ranting about periods? Anyway, things are good!

The only area of my life that could use a little TLC is my marriage. Nothing drastic, but with all the illnesses, birthdays, weaning, etc.. something had to be put on the back burner and unfortunately, since he is so sweet and understanding, I pushed my hubby to the back of the line. He didn't mind at all since he's been working late hours and would rather veg out and play computer games than work on "us" anyway. I'm not bitching, just sayin'. lol

But now, things are calm and we are making time for each other. It's been nice! I'm even hoping to get a date out of him on Sat. since Ms. Thang will be at her dad's and the Scientist will be at my in-laws.

We've sort of been on a scary kick, being October and all. It started with Ms. Thang wanting to find old episodes of the Twilight Zone, and instead settling on Season one- Tales from the Crypt. (Cindy do you remember watching those at my house and Thunder in Paradise with Hulk Hogan? lol) Anyway, I'm hoping our date night includes watching Zombieland at the drive in. I heard it's better than Shaun of the Dead and if that is the case, we'll have a great time!

If you have never seen Shaun of the Dead, run and get it right now. I'll wait.....

Fine, need a little incentive? Let me set up one of my favorite scenes:
A group of friends are trapped in their favorite bar while zombies try to get inside and kill them. It's intense! One actually comes in through a back door just as the jukebox goes off and starts blaring Queen-Don't Stop Me Now! What's a guy to do? Grab a cue stick and use the beat to his advantage of course! SEE? The scene actually gets funnier as it goes on. Go rent it.

How did I start ranting about zombies? Anyway, like I said, life is good. :)

Monday, October 5, 2009

Party for the girls!

Well this was the party that almost never was. It was week 3 of reoccurring illness for just about everyone in our family. Somehow my honey managed to miss it, and with his asthma and weak lungs it would have hit him hardest so for that I'm thankful, but for the rest of us I give a big BOO HOO! It was not fun! The party was scheduled for noon on the 3rd, but after many guests canceled due to illness, and then the scientist got really sick, I decided to throw some decor on the walls, whip up a couple of cakes, and have it on Friday night for the few guests that could make it. I figure the baby just needed some memorable pictures, and Ms. Thang just had a stay-over with her friend and watched movies which is all a 12yr old really wants anyway. Well that and money lol.
So here are the pictures!
Here are a few I took after I put up the decorations. Ms. Thang has her new glasses on here in the first pic. They are pink so it's hard to see them, but I assure you, she looks cute!
(why does blogger always make my photos look grainy?)
Ms. Thang, being the little socialite she is, changed clothes even for this small party and did her hair. Cutecumber looks as shocked as I am that her bow is still in her hair at this point.

Here is one with the boy. He was feeling pretty bad and stayed on the couch for most of the party. :(
We do presents first and then cake. How many times can a kid ask if they can open presents in the span of 30 minutes? 10
They both got a pretty good haul. Cutecumber got a slew of toys, (Blocks, puzzles, stuffed animals) and Ms. Thang got mostly gift cards and cash. I'm usually busy during the gifts and rarely get pics, but here are a few.
They always love the wrapping more than the gifts don't they?
Cake! The candles MT picked out really looked cute and fun. Her cake was supposed to be covered in pretty blue centered daisies but my decorating tool cracked right when I started the white. Drat!

You can see Ms. Thang's stay-over friend. She brought Monsters vs Aliens and they sat in a pile of pillows, blankets, and popcorn for a few hours lol.
And here is Cutecumber. We practiced blowing out the candle for about a week. End result..lip sealed, flame mesmerization
But the rest, was a piece of cake...

Here is a bonus picture of Ms. Thang and her violin. LOOKING like she can play beautifully. :)
Happy birthday girls!
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